March 22, 2003
Attention all Ninjas
So tomorrow morning (well, in 2 hours), I head to the airport for my first flight in the post-whatever age. So I clicked on over to the Transportation Security Administration's website and found this list (pdf) of what is and isn't allowed as carry-on or checked baggage.
Cigar cutters, knitting/crochet needles, toy transformer robots and umbrellas are all specifically mentioned as perfectly OK to carry on with you. Well, that's a relief. I never travel anywhere without my vintage 1927 Cohiba guillotine and a few random Decepticons to play with.
Hand grenades, plastic explosives, tear gas, chlorine for pools and spas (!) and flare guns are all strictly out of bounds. I won't make any jokes here, for fear of ending up on Ashcroft's kill-list, but I do wonder if anyone's spoken up yet for America's neglected long-distance-travelling-pool-cleaning class. Often forgotten, tragically underrepresented. God bless you, you pool cleaners.
Some of the "no carry-on, but it's OK to check it in" items make me a little apprehensive about what kind of homicidal maniacs might be sitting across the aisle from me. Leave your hatchets, bows and arrows, meat cleavers, sabers, and (wow!) portable cordless power saws in the checked bags, gang. The serial killing can wait until you're on the ground.
But the most interesting thing for me is how detailed they get as to what ninja weapons are banned from carry-ons. Not content with the catchall of "ninja weapons", they specify which weapons are out. No nunchakus. No stun guns. No night sticks or black jacks. Not even throwing stars! Having played a little (meaning a lot) of D&D in my day, I'm surprised they haven't stated a specific policy on what to do with your glaive-guisarme or your arquebus. But if there are any ninjas on my morning flight to Omaha, I guess it's comforting to know they'll be under control.
Posted by michaelf at March 22, 2003 03:16 AM | TrackBackComments
Hey, update your site so that bunkosquad's stock shows up at http://www.blogshares.com !!!! I was tempted to sneak in and post something for you, but I managed to restrain myself. ;)
Posted by: Sooz at April 3, 2003 12:46 PM
While they are not specifically mentioned, I think it's fairly safe to extrapolate for the glaive-guisarme (liberty pole-arm, maybe?) and arquebus. The former could be either an axe (in the tool section) or an ice pick (on a rather long pole!) in the sharp objects section. In either case, it's pretty clear you can check your g-g through, provided it is sheathed or securely wrapped. The arquebus, though notoriously unreliable (despite the fact that I made it through a whole campaign without mine blowing up), is clearly a firearm.
However, if you _really_ need a weapon on-board, and you don't mind only doing subdual damage, it appears that whips are allowed, provided it doesn't have barbs or anything. Interestingly, there is almost no restriction on bludgeoning weapons, so your cleric is fighting at full effectiveness.
Posted by: Yxylu at April 3, 2003 01:09 PM
Of course, if you have a competent mage in your travelling party, you need to groom and train him to using a Teleportation spell and avoid the hassle of air travel altogether. Though, honestly, a 1st-level cleric with a halfway-decent grasp of "Charm Person" should be able to outmaneuver airport security and make all these restrictions moot.
Posted by: Michael at April 3, 2003 04:09 PM
